(Garden Grove, California)

Since they aren't talking to police, we are all left to wonder where Tiger Woods was going at 2:25 a.m. on Friday, and why his wife was up, golf club in hand. I lived in Central Florida for four years. In the spirit of David Letterman's famed "Top Ten" lists, here is mine. If you have other ideas, post them in the comments section below!

10. He heard Bill Clinton and Greg Norman were having another “after midnight” golf party in Miami.

9. He was having one of those Taco Bell “run for the border” moments.

8. His wife sent him to 7-11 to pick up a copy of the National Enquirer.

7. He was mad that that other guy with the hot, blond wife was stealing all the Thanksgiving headlines (you know, Tareq and Michaele Salahi, who crashed the White House State Dinner).

6. He heard voices saying, “Tiger Woods! You’re Going to Disneyworld!”

5. Early seating in Gainesville for the Florida v. Florida State game on Saturday.

4. He was meeting Congressman Patrick Kennedy for a 3:30 a.m. vote at the U.S. Capitol.

3. Midnight golf (there really is a lighted golf course, open at night, west of Gainesville).

2. He was inspired by Saran Palin to, “go rogue!”

1. He was headed to the “Black Friday” sale at Target. They had 2 for 1 sale on maroon golf shirts, black pants and Nike baseball caps, and he just doesn't have enough of those already!